Why are modern people so evil and cruel. Why are people so cruel? Why do kind people become cruel? Why are there so many cruel people

People are cruel not because of passivity, but because they are unable to resist the order of a superior.

In the 60s-70s, classic socio-psychological studies were carried out, which proved that even normal, decent people can carry out extremely cruel orders due to the so-called "instinct of blind obedience." But a new study, published in the journal PLOS Biology on Nov. 20, 2012, revisits the above findings. Professor Alexander Haslam and Stephen Reicher argue that the cause is not only the "instinct of blind obedience", but also a certain "enthusiasm".

In the 70s of the last century, Philip Zambardo conducted the so-called prison experiment, during which college students were conditionally divided into two groups. One group acted as prisoners, and the other as guards. The researchers found that the students got used to the new roles rather quickly, that the guards began to show extreme cruelty towards the prisoners, and the latter were in a state of depression and hopelessness.

For ethical reasons, the experiment had to be interrupted. Based on the experiment, it was concluded that a person who is obliged to obey carries out orders (even if it contradicts his beliefs) of those who occupy a higher position, infuture.ru reports.

Professor Alexander Haslam from the University of Queensland argues that cruelty is not the result of blind obedience, that most often people rebuild their psyche, beginning to believe that this is the only right decision.

Alexander Haslam: “People show cruelty not because of passivity, not because they are unable to resist the order of a superior. We came to the conclusion that, having received an order, a person rebuilds his psyche, he begins to believe that this is the only correct decision.

The researchers conducted their own experiment, similar to the one conducted by Philip Zambardo. As a result, three conclusions were drawn.

It is impossible to impose any actions on a person, including cruel ones. Even in the case when a person is subordinate to the one from whom the order comes. The performer either independently makes a decision, or convinces himself of his fidelity.

People act according to their roles. They take on the role they are predisposed to or aspire to.

The boundaries of what is permitted must be established in the team. If the number of dissatisfied increases, then the rules can gradually change. If the rules are preserved, then these norms are acceptable to the majority.

The professor concludes that "tyranny" is not the result of the fact that people cannot resist the order, but because the majority believes in the correctness of the established norms and feels "psychologically stable" within these limits.

IN Lately It is very difficult for me to understand what is happening with people around. Have we changed so much, or has the world changed so much? Is that why we have become so cruel, so sharp with words towards each other? Where does cruelty in people come from?

Why are people so cruel and mean

It would seem that we are fighting for the best and at the same time we do not know how to do it with dignity. We do not know how to do something good without offending the people around us. Many people have so much anger, pride and envy deep down inside that it simply overwhelms them. The most important thing is that those who are most dissatisfied with something most often have all those qualities that they condemn in others.

We do not pay attention to ourselves, we see only other people's shortcomings and problems. And it's so gratifying when something doesn't work out for someone. If we were smarter, we would not rejoice at other people's problems, but would try to help someone who needs it solve them. And if you have a smart and bright head, then you will not emphasize and focus on the fact that someone has failed in something.

Is it really that hard to just be human? Deal with your problems, rejoice in your achievements, help those who need it. Is it really necessary to condemn someone, and indeed to poke your nose into other people's affairs? Why is human nature like this? Why are we always more concerned with other people's affairs than our own? We have no right to judge anyone, because there is no absolute truth, there is no standard and ideal.

Why are there so many cruel people

Because being dissatisfied, complaining and complaining is always easier than doing something to fix the situation, achieve goals, make your life better. Yes, there will always be those who will be dissatisfied with something, there is simply no way without it, but are there really so few of those who can think with their own minds, assess the situation objectively? If so, then just put yourself in the place of this or that person, and, as they say, stay in his shoes. Then you will see how everything looks from the other side.

Relationships between people include different facets of communication. You can love each other, hate, be neutral, keep within the bounds of decency and give vent to your character (and it is often incredibly difficult, sometimes impossible, to resist). Among other things, there is cruelty.

Why does violence occur?

The word rudeness can become synonymous with cruelty. A cruel person rudely treats the interlocutor (out of malice or ignorance), not taking into account the thoughts and desires of the opponent, not thinking about his mental or physical pain. Conversion involves influence on all levels, from the moral to the physical. Even the malicious denial of a request for help is included in this list.

It is impossible to evaluate all cruelty as a categorically negative, negative phenomenon. When answering the question why people are cruel to each other, how to treat this, it is important to analyze What exactly was the aggression?

Forced. For example, a girl who was attacked by a maniac in the park fights off the offender. In this case, her actions are justified, aimed at preventing a greater evil, therefore, such cruelty cannot be condemned. Even the law will justify the defender. In some cases, aggression can even be rewarded - if, for example, we are talking about wartime and the defenders of their land.

Unreasonable. In this case, the reason for cruelty will be a weighty argument only for the aggressor, and sometimes not even realized. For example, a person can be angry with another, and he will release his anger, having broken because of a trifle on someone third, in relation to whom rudeness is completely unreasonable. Or the aggressor humiliates the opponent only for the sake of increasing his own self-esteem - this is also unjustified anger.

Important! The validity of aggression or its absence is determined in each specific case, depending on the details of the situation and the current cultural and historical situation.

Violent adults

Every person at least once experienced cruelty from two sides: both as an aggressor and as a victim. This is a natural emotional outburst, but only if it happens rarely. Those who often feel angry and want to hurt their neighbor are more likely to have psychological problems, psychologists are sure.

To summarize, the causes of cruelty in adults can be the following:

Problems with self-esteem.

Violated ideas about morality, morality.
Self-affirmation, a distorted attempt at self-preservation.
Fears from childhood, which appeared due to the indifference or cruelty of parents, persisted into adulthood.
Proof of one's own importance by humiliating, suppressing, killing others (this is sadism - a form bordering, sometimes coexisting with madness).
Revenge.
Covering personal complexes.

Adults often have abuse - this is also cruelty, humiliation, submission, suppression of a partner, when for some reason he is dependent on the abuser. Moreover, such violence can happen even in relation to a loved one. More often, men become such aggressors, however, women can also have a similar tendency.

cruel children

In the case of children, things are different. The division into justified aggression and not is preserved, but the list of reasons for the cruelty of a small person in the second case is already different.

The child grows and develops, looking at the closest people in his life, copying their behavior, accepting it as an absolute norm. This adult can question the fact, challenge it, develop his own point of view, but a child who is just learning to live is not capable of this. If cruelty has become the norm for him, most often it is in mom and dad. For example, if it is customary in a family to swear, insult, raise a hand against each other, then the child will perceive this state of affairs as natural.

Having seen from a deeply believing mother cruel corporal punishment for children's offenses, carried out in religious zeal "in the name of saving the child's soul", a small person is unlikely to grow up understanding and capable of forgiveness.

Even in a family where they profess peace, cruelty can be engendered in a child. Often this happens because of deception. Parents teach their child morality, and then, in front of their own eyes, for some reason, the boundaries set by themselves are transgressed. As a result, children develop resentment against the “deceivers”, they begin to get angry.

Even so, a child hungry for attention can break. In the presence of the Internet, he can easily find interest in his person in a dysfunctional company, this will entail cruelty too. However, overprotection and total control act similarly.

At 9-11 years old, the most important stage in the development of children passes - separation from parents as the most faithful example of life and the transfer of this title to society. It is important for a student to prove his place in the class, acquire a certain status, gradually become popular, this process can also be associated with aggression.

Attention! Children's cruelty is often manifested in relation to those who are weaker - animals. If we are talking about a crumb, then the reasons for the cruelty of a small person can be simple ignorance of the rules of treatment and a misunderstanding that the beast is also alive. Then the only way out is to explain what could have happened if the parents had not been on time. If a grown child does this, then this is either an attempt to vent anger, or that very statement in the team.

Are all people evil

Everyone is familiar with cruelty. But this does not mean that every person is evil. Cruelty is a natural emotion, which is aimed at self-preservation, defending one's boundaries. Why it is absolutely normal for people to be angry sometimes is because anger is a kind of psychological barrier that protects a person.

It is important to be able to build this defense correctly. “The freedom of each ends where the freedom of another begins,” this quote belongs to the philosopher M.A. Bakunin, and it perfectly reflects how cruelty should be treated. In a critical situation, it is permissible to defend your freedoms in this way, but in no case should you encroach on others. No less carefully should we study ways of peacefully resolving external and internal conflicts. To do this, get acquainted with educational literature (psychology of communication and conflictology), work out the theory received. Aggression should be reserved as a last resort.

Important! It is generally impossible to refuse cruelty, since as a result of this there will be a gradual suppression of the personality of the one who refuses.

Society is gradually gaining more and more freedom, because people have become more evil. However, this is not a reason to refuse a calm discussion of the problem. Moreover, the principles of mutual respect and peaceful conversations should be laid from early childhood.

How to change a cruel person

Friendship with an evil person will not please anyone. Anger is not a sentence, you can still work on it. For this, the following characteristics are important:

Self-confidence. Cruel people feel the weaker ones, and they more often than others become victims of their attacks. With a self-confident person, verbal abuse simply won't work - he knows that they are false.
Ability to talk about a problem. For someone who is used to being angry, it may simply not be clear how it looks from the outside. You should talk with the aggressor, without pretensions, discuss the situation.
adequate self-esteem. A soft, weak-willed person who is unable to adequately evaluate himself will always be a “whipping boy” for “energy vampires” (that is, for those who assert themselves by humiliating another).

It will not be superfluous to take care of yourself: learn self-defense techniques and carefully filter your environment. An envious, overly self-confident person who does not want to change anything in his life is not the best friend and interlocutor.

Important! In the case of abuse, no remedy will help, there is only one way out of such a relationship for the benefit of the victim - cessation of communication.

How to deal with cruelty yourself

If a person has become aware of cruelty in himself (by himself or through a conversation with a loved one), then the first thing he must understand is the problem that needs to be fought. You need to do it like this:

Visit a specialist. In psychology, the science of mental processes there is always a way to solve the problem. You just need to reach a psychologist and honestly discuss the situation with him.

Work on your self-esteem. You may have to assess your capabilities soberly, maybe you will need to learn not to underestimate your merits.
Develop empathy. It is easy to offend another without paying attention to his feelings. If this is done with the aggressor himself, most likely he will not like this experience. Therefore, it is important to study the technique “how will it be for a neighbor”: every word, action should be tried on for yourself, noting the reaction. The final indicator will be the developed ability to “feel” the emotions of another, this will help to cope with excessive anger.

The conclusion from the above can be one thing: cruelty is the real fire of personality. It must exist, be used for good, but for this it requires an attentive attitude towards oneself. Aggression left to chance can seriously spoil the life of both a cruel person and his environment.

Video

Every day, a continuous negative of various scales penetrates into our lives. The media obligingly report who killed, robbed, and shot down whom. Constantly various sources of information bring to our attention information about new cataclysms, political turmoil. And the positive, in comparison with the amount of negative news, is negligible. It seems that there is absolutely no good and good in the world. Unfortunately, this flow has “littered” the heads so much that today no one even thinks why people are so cruel? How to change it? And is modern humanity really so soulless?

Main reasons

Why are there so many cruel people? The answer to this question should be sought in the causes of aggression. It should be noted that the manifestation of cruelty is quite many-sided. However, it is not difficult to recognize her. A person who hurts another by causing suffering, whether morally or physically, who is fully aware of this and seeks to cause harm, is cruel.

Psychologists identify three reasons why people are cruel:

Dissatisfaction with life. Persons dissatisfied with their fate are often subjected to stress and depression. These emotions so strongly overwhelm their soul that at any moment they are ready to break free. That is why all the negativity is often splashed out by mothers on children. Some people, under the influence of anger, break branches of trees, beat animals. This state of mind is quite dangerous, because it threatens the owner with the occurrence of neuroses, mental disorders. In addition to all this, constant negativity seriously shortens life expectancy, leads to the development of heart disease or skin problems.
Indifference. Very often it is it that generates unjustified cruelty. Some people do not even try to understand how much pain their actions, and sometimes words, can cause. They don't think about how much they can hurt another. At the same time, a weak creature becomes the object of their cruelty, which cannot show emotions and explain what pain they caused him.
Suppressed emotions. Sometimes a person shows aggression "on the side." Such behavior is characteristic of those who in everyday life are forced to constantly hide and suppress desires, emotions, impulses. Most often, such cruelty is characteristic of grown-up children (especially boys) who grew up in a family of authoritarian parents. Employees who are forced to unquestioningly carry out the orders of the boss, not being able to reveal their will, in some conditions can show extremely cruel ruthlessness.

historical brutality

The older generation likes to wonder - why did so many cruel people appear? Everyone was better before. Listening to their complaints, you involuntarily agree. One has only to open a newspaper or watch the news.

Earlier people Worth thinking about. And before - when? Thousands of years ago, when cannibalism flourished? Well, these people can be by and large even somehow justified. They were primitive. And they did not know at all about the humane attitude towards their neighbor. Or maybe those who lived in the era of the Inquisition were kinder? Or during the reign of Stalin? Many people were imprisoned thanks to denunciations. How many such "good people" sincerely tried to give their neighbor a "gift"!

Why does it feel like there are so many cruel people today? Of course, the media did their bit. In an era of democracy, they pay more attention to manifestations of cruelty. It should be noted that the level of humanity in humanity has also increased, which is why aggression is so striking.

Relations with relatives

All people tend to show cruelty. For some this happens very rarely. Others often show aggression. At the same time, anyone can commit a cruel act, and quite often such outbursts occur in really kind people. Unfortunately, all the negativity spills out on the closest relatives and friends. For those who are truly loved and very dear. Why are people so cruel? What makes them "tear off" anger at their relatives, and restrain outbursts of anger with others? Why is it impossible to control your behavior when communicating with loved ones?

Yes, because relatives Communicating with strangers, a person restrains himself. There are many reasons: both the desire to win over the interlocutor, and the fear of losing an interesting friend. In the case of the boss, intemperance can threaten with dismissal. But when you get into the circle of relatives, especially in a bad mood, even one word can infuriate a person. That's when the scandal flares up completely empty place. Of course, this is fundamentally wrong, but the accumulated negative needs to be discharged. That is why it pours out on the closest relatives and friends. They, even if they are strongly offended and quarreled with them, love so much that they will forgive them anyway.

root of evil

The feeling of anger is given by nature. It is necessary in order to mobilize all forces for the struggle at dangerous moments. But how it will be used by a person depends on the moral standards instilled in childhood. If parents show aggression towards a child, it will definitely come back to haunt. Relationships between children and fathers, based on fear, are likely to be adopted by a teenager in communication with peers. It is in the family that one should look for the root of evil. Such upbringing clearly explains why people become cruel.

Although in this situation, the child may develop another model of behavior: he decides that he is bad and is to blame for everything. Such a teenager becomes a victim of peer abuse. Often he does not even look for methods of protection, believing that he deserved this.

Sometimes the cause of aggression may not be violence at all, but overprotection. This method of education puts a sense of permissiveness into the subconscious of the child. A teenager considers himself the most important and demands unquestioning obedience. Unfortunately, a person who has not been taught by his parents to respect others will not gain this wisdom anywhere else. He will not even notice how he humiliates.

Instability in society

An indirect cause of cruelty is the growing anxiety. instability creates a feeling of discomfort. From TV screens, people see cruelty again. A person whose psyche is formed is able to distinguish the grain from the husk, he will not accept aggression as a call to action. The child will absorb, like a sponge, on-screen scenes of violence. And he can perceive all this as a kind of school of life. It is important to realize how much such television hurts the child's psyche, and the answer to the question: "Why did people become cruel?" will be received instantly.

Feeling rejected

It is especially developed in adolescence. However, many adults carry these feelings into adulthood. Quite often, one can observe a picture when a baby exclaims loudly on the street and points a finger at a person with a different skin color or a physical handicap.

Adults react very differently. On a subconscious level, they experience a sense of danger. This is where the desire to self-destruct comes in. But for some it manifests itself in cruelty and violence. It is this feeling that sometimes makes teenagers mock peers who are different from them. Why are people so cruel? Again, the instilled skills of tolerance and respect in the family will not allow a teenager or an adult to behave this way.

How to defend the victim

Psychologists say that in a team it is quite easy to determine which people are cruel and who are the “lamb”. Therefore, the victim of aggression is advised to identify the following signs:

diffidence;
full acceptance of the opinion that trouble is deserved.

You should start with the awareness of your "I". Every person has a number of advantages and disadvantages. He is what he is. And no one has the right to offend him. Only by fully accepting this truth can one move further along the path of raising self-esteem, developing a sense of success. Parents can help the child in this realization. For an adult, since the behavior model has taken root, it is better to use the help of a professional psychologist.

As a rule, a hobby for some new business helps a lot. You can even enroll in a martial arts class.

It is very important to think over the reaction to the offender. He will perceive you very differently if the answer is different from his expectations. In some cases, it helps Try not to succumb to irritation and direct a difficult conflict into the mainstream of a joke. At the same time, learn to perceive less acutely unpleasant situations.

How to deal with your own aggression?

The reasons described above give an idea of why kind people become cruel. But how to deal with such manifestations? What to do if you start to boil internally?

Great for clearing negativity physical exercise. After all, sport teaches conscious control over your emotions and body. Psychologists often recommend mastering breathing exercises. It will allow you to control both the body and the spirit.

Find a safe outlet for the accumulated negativity. Throw out your emotions with a cry. Just not for relatives and not for a colleague. Shout where you need it. For example, become an ardent football fan or attend rock concerts.

By the way, psychologists recommend this technique: stand near the railway in the evening. When the train passes, yell at the top of your lungs, as loud as you can. The noise of the wheels will drown out any sound. No one will hear you, and the body will receive the necessary discharge.

Conclusion

Remember that only you can deal with the feeling of cruelty that arises inside you. And this is completely within your power. If you want to find the answer to the question "why are people so cruel", start with yourself. Analyze your behavior. Get rid of the toxic feeling, because sooner or later it threatens to turn into a severe depression.

Feeling angry familiar to every person.

This condition is explained not only from a psychological, but also from a medical point of view.

What is it: definition of the concept

Anger- This is a negative emotional reaction, in which an extreme degree of discontent and irritation is felt.

It is caused by specific circumstances, the actions of other people, their own mistakes.

Often this feeling occurs for no apparent reason because of internal contradictions tearing apart the personality.

Anger is an exclusively negative, destructive phenomenon. It negatively affects not only the emotional state of the person experiencing it, but also his relationship with others.

The more people in society who demonstrate discontent and irritation, the more negative the mood of all its members as a whole.

The same thing happens in a small group: one disgruntled person can ruin the mood of everyone else.

Psychology of the emergence of feelings

When a person becomes angry, special neurons located in the hypothalamus are activated. Anger performs the role of a defense mechanism. By the appearance of this feeling, we can judge the presence of a problem that is present at a given time.

Often people engage in self-deception and ignore the negative reactions that arise in their minds.

As a result, the unpleasant feeling is suppressed, but does not disappear.

It stays deep inside and weakens the internal resources of the individual.

For this reason, it is so important to objectively assess such an emotional state, try to find a rational explanation for it and take measures to resolve the situation.

Anger arises for several reasons:

Anger can be short term or long term. In the first case, the experienced is reflected in the action being performed, the phrase spoken, etc.

As soon as a person releases the thoughts that torment him, he immediately returns to his normal state.

long-term anger accumulates over a long period of time. Such prolonged emotion can negatively affect the personality, lifestyle and relationships with others.

This feeling not always destructive.

In certain situations, it can be a powerful incentive to make important changes in your life.

The most productive anger at oneself.

Not all people are able to recognize the fact that all the events that happen to them are the result of their own thoughts and actions.

The ability to objectively assess your shortcomings helps you learn to control your life and. Exactly anger becomes a powerful force, thanks to which a person completely changes the reality surrounding him.

Medical factors

In a state of stress, irritation, anger in people, the level of norepinephrine.

This hormone of the adrenal medulla, which is in many ways similar in its characteristics to adrenaline.

During negative emotional reactions due to an increase in the level of norepinephrine in the blood there is an increase in heart rate, an increase in blood pressure, and blood supply to the muscles increases.

If you pay attention to an angry person, you can notice the redness of his face, muscle tension, and a change in facial expressions.

In a state of strong excitement, a person begins to speak loudly, his nostrils swell, his breathing quickens.

All these outward manifestations of experienced discontent are the result of an increase in the level of norepinephrine in the blood. It is for this reason that it is so important not to keep feelings in yourself, but to give them an outlet. This allows reduce the negative impact on the body.

Causes of malice

Anger arises for various reasons. Depending on the gender and age of the person, these reasons may differ.

Society

Why do people become so evil and cruel? Modern society simultaneously makes a lot of demands and provides many temptations.

In the pursuit of material wealth, people often do not notice how they constantly experience a feeling of dissatisfaction. They don't like their job, income, apartment, car, family, etc.

The desire to live up to the imposed ideals and the constant hustle and bustle of life plunge people into a state of exhaustion, chronic fatigue. All this leads to the fact that the slightest external stimuli become the cause of anger.

People swear in public transport because of the closeness and closeness, quarrel with neighbors because of the noise in the apartment, share parking spaces in the yard, envy more successful colleagues, etc.

There are not many real reasons why you should really be angry for the average person.

If you learn is at peace with himself and with those around him, then you can minimize the frequency of occurrence of this destructive emotion.

Important appreciate small pleasures, take care of loved ones, get out into nature more often, communicate with animals, etc. The kinder a person is, the more favorable the atmosphere around him is. Evil people, as a rule, see in all the surrounding phenomena and events one negative.

Among women

Why did I become evil?

An aggressive woman is not only not happy herself, but also makes her loved ones unhappy: her husband, children.

Main reasons, according to which the girl becomes vicious:

Irritability during pregnancy

changes during pregnancy progesterone and estrogen levels in a woman's blood. This leads to the appearance of anxiety, irritability, sharp.

Women in position become simultaneously vulnerable, impressionable and. Often they are not able to control their own behavior.

In addition to hormonal changes, significant physiological changes occur in the body: weight gain, swelling, nausea, fatigue, drowsiness, etc. All this also negatively affects the emotional state of the expectant mother.

Of great importance is the forced need to lead a normal life for a certain period of time.

Pregnant women should perform professional duties, do housework, take care of their husband regardless of their health and psychological state.

On the later dates the inability to perform elementary actions without outside help (tying shoelaces, climbing into the shower, climbing stairs) often becomes an additional cause of irritation.

In men

Men are less emotional than women. Reasons why they usually feel angry:

unsatisfied need (for food, sex, care, money, material goods, etc.);
lack of recognition (from the beloved woman, colleagues, family);
illness with resulting poor health;
troubles (personal, professional, material);
envy;
loneliness.

Anger in children and adolescents

Teenage aggression, as a rule, manifests itself more clearly. This is due to the immaturity of the psyche, the inability to control their behavior, the desire to attract attention.

It is important for parents and professionals recognize the child's problems early and take appropriate action. The main causes of children's anger:

Thus, anger is destructive feeling with which it is necessary to be able to fight at any age.

A suppressed negative reaction can cause serious harm to the human body.

Why are people evil? Learn about it from the video:

Why do people become evil? IN modern world often there are people embittered at life. When you walk down the street and suddenly look into the face of a passer-by, you immediately lose the desire to look at people completely. Most walk around with sullen expressions on their faces. Everyone has their own problems in life. People lack material wealth, well-being in the family, happiness and love. They look for it everywhere, but given that they see the bad side in everything, few people find it and therefore get upset and angry. All living beings on this planet are created in order to enjoy life and accept its gifts, but they loaded their brains that everything gets a lot of work. Some believe that they are unworthy of blessings, they even stopped dreaming and believing.

All people love when their. But how can one understand and love an evil person? When, while trying to somehow take a liking to him, to understand him, you stumble upon thorns and insults addressed to you. Complaints about misunderstanding is a common manifestation of the character of such a person. Well, how can you not be offended that there is no one to listen and support you? Yes, you yourself reject any approach from the outside. Try to give your loved ones a chance and you will understand that they are not as bad people as it seemed before. If no one comes up to you on his own, don't get angry and don't keep everything to yourself, come by yourself, I assure you it will become much easier. And the people around you will stop being afraid and ignore you. When you need help, you need to ask for it, when you need support, there are many people around who can support.

It is hard to live if you do not feel strong support behind your back. Look at the world with different eyes, it is not as scary and cruel as it seemed. Even if some person treats you unkindly, stop blaming him for this, think about it and perhaps you will understand that you yourself are to blame for this situation. Stop spoiling, try to improve them.

Unreached goals

Unloved job, low salary, lack of growth and advancement in life. Another justified reason for anger. No one will be able to enjoy what is happening at the moment if the desire for something does not work out in any way. You should not close yourself in and be offended by life. Maybe this is just not what you need now, but if you really want to, then try other methods that you would never have taken before. The support and understanding of your loved ones will help you with this. How to achieve this was written in the first paragraph. Every person needs goals in order to develop. It is quite possible that you do not yet have aspirations and you have not thought about what you really want. I suggest you do it right now. You need to have some kind of end point in your head. Think about how you will live if you achieve your plan. Make a list and take action. The main thing is not to doubt.

It happens that one successful businessman, but studied somehow at school and institute, and the other is an excellent student in all subjects, with a bunch of diplomas and thanks, but somehow the work is not found and in general life is not going well. That's when such a negative emotion as envy wakes up. Everyone wants to live and not deny themselves anything. Most likely, who became a businessman never thought that he was unworthy of something or that he envied another. He just had a plan on which to act soon got results. Do not envy someone, appreciate what you have. Do not think that all blessings fall from heaven into hands, it is not. Most often, hard work and faith in a successful outcome are hidden behind the achieved results. Rejoice for successful person Look at how he behaves and what he says. There are many useful things you can do for yourself. You can be like that too, or even better. Everything depends on you.

They say that there are no evil people, there are offended by life. Resentment is also a negative emotion. And it takes root from the fact that society is accustomed to blaming circumstances and other people for everything. What's the point of this? If you want to do something, you need to stick together, look for allies and a common idea, and not be offended by each other. Disunity allows cities and countries, to say nothing of a small team. Internecine strife is a terrible thing. It is necessary to try to avoid its appearance at all stages of work. They can destroy everything. Need support, ask, need advice, contact. Nobody wants evil. Stop thinking like that. Learn to help and support those around you and they will do the same for you. It is high time to understand that among friends you should not look for enemies. This is not beneficial to you. Grievances divide people, make them strangers. Understanding in the future is very difficult to get back. Take responsibility for your actions and perhaps some kind of logical chain will be traced, you will come to the understanding that there are no guilty parties in the quarrel, there is only a desire to avoid responsibility.

Negative stereotypes

How many times have you told the world that by radiating negativity, you will attract more similar situations to yourself that cause negative emotions. What is needed for success? Faith that everything will come true. If you want to taste success, feel like a successful and prosperous person. Let yourself take a deep breath. Remove the shackles of unnecessary statements that have accumulated in your head for many years. Let them go and start living differently. Think more about dreams, make plans, even the most incredible ones, build your life the way you dream about. Help each other to push off the dead center and start moving. We need to learn to give more. Everything will definitely come back. Of course, at first you will have to make efforts and show willpower, to prove to yourself that all the steps are not in vain. Write what you want to see your life in a few years. Only without limiting stereotypes and act. Do not believe the words, better try.

Throughout our lives, we have at least once met a person who, in our opinion, was cruel, angry and decidedly disgusting to us.

If your past is in any way similar to other people's past, you were most likely teased, gossiped about, shouted at, humiliated, cornered, intimidated and unfairly punished - and your reaction was probably this: " FOR WHAT?"

Why are people angry with each other? Why do some people even enjoy being bitchy and venomous? You, like most people, will answer something along the lines of "...because they are bad people", "...because they are psychopaths / sociopaths", "...they are evil", "...well, that's how they are, what can you do!"

Yes, such answers are quite normal and common, however, this view of things is very narrow. These answers are naive, and it's time to better understand why "bad people are bad."

Why do we like to be offended?

You are talking to someone, you said something frankly offensive, and your interlocutor is offended by you. He rises threateningly and says, “You know, I found out something about you. You are a real bastard and you don't care about anyone but yourself. No wonder you have almost no friends." And then it is quickly washed off.

What is your reaction?

Full of righteous anger, you can jump up and start refuting all attacks by striking back. Well, or you will continue to sit, thinking about what you said, while sadness-longing will slowly devour you. “How could he do this to me?”, “What the hell have I done?”. You can continue to cook in your hatred, cursing everything around.

These two reactions are quite common, I myself have behaved in a similar way in the past. Responding to another person's anger breaks our peace of mind... but you know what I'll tell you? We like to be outraged. We like to be drunk with anger.

When we feel unfairly offended, we immediately reward ourselves with the title of “victim”, and not only, we also experience a sense of our own superiority. How often in the past have you been angry at a "disgusting person" with the firm belief that "I'm a lot better." I think often. But don't worry, it's normal. We all do it.

The fact is that anger is like a drug, and not only because it gives us a false feeling that we are allegedly better, more beautiful, more correct, more just. In addition to this, it creates the illusion of a distinction between us and the world (in other words, it strengthens our ego). Because of this, we cannot see through the veil of misbehavior - because of our unwillingness to get rid of anger.

Once we are fully prepared to let go of our anger and all its charms, we can truly understand why people are so bad. This realization will be of infinite benefit to you.

How to tear off the mask of mock cruelty?

When we blame bad and cruel people for all mortal sins, we deprive them of all human qualities. Yes, you will say that there are psychopaths and sociopaths who have no empathy and no remorse at all. But these people (who by the way make up a very low percentage of the population) are not robots either. In fact, they also suffer from feelings of loneliness, resentment, disappointment, depression, and this explains a lot. Psychopaths can even show empathy when they want to.

I am convinced that not all "bad" people we meet are necessarily psychopaths or sociopaths, in fact they are deeply hurt. And we don't have time to sort out their feelings, because they are disgusting to us (and because, let's face it, we ourselves have been deeply hurt).

We spew out excuses like “So what? We are all sufferers, but this is no excuse at all, ”and in this way we strengthen our confidence in our rightness and continue to torment ourselves.

However, if you are willing to take responsibility for yourself, your life, and your happiness, there is one thing you need to remember:

All cruel, evil, rude people are just like that, because they hurt.

If you want to look behind the veil of this ostentatious cruelty, you need to understand "what hurts." You may have to dig into his past, talk with friends, colleagues to find out why he behaves this way. Well, or just guess.

No matter which approach you take, you are bound to learn something surprising: their behavior is driven by pain.

Perhaps it's family quarrels, problems at work, breakup or divorce, tragedy or something more vague like depression, fear of failure, fear of rejection, low self-esteem, experiences when a person cannot cope with this pain, he directs it on others. And thus the pain is equalized, multiplying.

But it is in your power to interrupt this circle of pain and prevent it from interfering with your thoughts, feelings, life. The most important thing is to learn to see all these mechanisms in your own head and, as a result, to truly understand a person.

The next time someone treats you badly, take your time. Feel it all negative emotions and then release them. Ask yourself, “What pain is this person experiencing that makes them do this?” Then open yourself to forgiveness and understanding, because all the mental patterns that led to such behavior on his part are or were in you. And the only reason why you can not have them is either a perfect childhood and adulthood or

Once a day, a continuous negative of various scales seeps into our lives. The media obligingly report who killed, robbed, and shot down whom. Constantly different sources of information bring to our attention information about new cataclysms, political turmoil. And the positive, in comparison with the amount of negative news, is negligible. A memory is created that there is no good and good in the world at all. Unfortunately, this stream has “littered” the heads so much that now no one even thinks why people are so merciless? How to change it? And is the modern population of the earth really so soulless?

Main prerequisites

Why are there so many violent people? The answer to this question should be found in the causes of anger. It should be seen that the manifestation of ruthlessness is quite many-sided. With all this, it is easy to recognize her. A person who hurts another, causing them to suffer, not fundamentally, morally or on a physical level, who is 100% aware of this and seeks to cause harm - is cruel.

Psychologists identify three reasons why people are violent:

Dissatisfaction with life. Persons who are dissatisfied with their own fate are quite often subjected to stress and depression. These emotions overwhelm their soul so much that at any moment they are ready to break free. That is why all the negativity is often splashed out by mothers on children. Some people, under the influence of anger, break tree branches, beat animals. This spiritual state quite unsafe, as it threatens the owner with the appearance of neuroses, psychological disorders. In addition to all this, the constant negativity seriously shortens life expectancy, leads to the development of heart disease or skin dilemmas.
Indifference. Very often, it specifically gives rise to unjustified ruthlessness. Some people do not even try to realize how much pain their actions can cause, and sometimes words. They don't think how much they can hurt another. With all this, the object of their ruthlessness becomes a weak creature that cannot show emotions and explain how much pain they caused him.
Suppressed emotions. From time to time, a person shows anger "on the side." Such behavior is characteristic of those who in daily life are obliged to constantly hide and suppress desires, emotions, impulses. In most cases, such ruthlessness is characteristic of grown children (especially boys) who grew up in a family of authoritarian parents. Employees who are obliged to unconditionally follow the orders of the boss, not being able to reveal their will, in certain conditions can show very cruel cruelty.

Historical ruthlessness

The older generation likes to be surprised - why so many violent people appeared? Everyone was better before. Listening to their complaints, you involuntarily agree. One has only to open a newspaper or look at the announcements.

Earlier people were kinder. Worth thinking about. And before - when? Thousands of years ago, when cannibalism flourished? Well, these people can actually be justified somehow. They were primitive. And they did not know at all about the humane attitude towards their neighbor. Or maybe those who were in the era of the Inquisition were kinder? Or during the reign of Stalin? A huge number of people sat in jails thanks to denunciations. How many such "good-natured people" wholeheartedly tried to give their neighbor a "gift"!

Why, then, does the feeling arise that there are so many hardened people now? Naturally, the media brought their mite. In the era of democracy, they pay more attention to manifestations of ruthlessness. It must be emphasized that the level of humanity among the population of the earth has increased, because anger is so very visible.

Affairs with relatives

It is common for all people to show ruthlessness. For some this happens very rarely. Others often show anger. With all this, anyone can commit a violent act, and quite often such outbursts occur in really good people. Unfortunately, all the negativity spills out on the closest relatives and friends. On those who are really loved and very dear. Why are people so ruthless? What forces them to "tear off" anger at their relatives, and restrain outbursts of anger with those around them? Why is it not possible to keep your behavior under control in a conversation with loved ones?

Yes, because relatives will not go anywhere. Communicating with strangers, a person restrains himself. There are many circumstances: both the desire to win over the interlocutor for oneself, and the fear of losing a fascinating friend. In the case of the boss, intemperance can threaten dismissal. But when you get into the circle of relatives, especially in a bad mood, even one word can infuriate a person. It was then that the scandal flared up out of nowhere. Naturally, this is fundamentally incorrect, but the accumulated negativity requires detente. That is why it pours out on the closest relatives and friends. They, even if they hurt them very much and quarrel with them, adore them so much that they will forgive them anyway.

root of evil

The feeling of anger is given by nature. It is necessary in order to mobilize all forces for the struggle in unsafe moments. But how it will be applied by a person depends on the norms of morality instilled in childhood. If the ancestors show anger towards the child, it will certainly backfire. Relations between children and fathers, based on horror, are most likely to be adopted by the child in conversation with peers. It is in the family that the root of evil should be found. This kind of upbringing explains why people become hardened.

Although in this situation, the baby may develop another model of behavior: he decides that he is bad and will blame everything. Such a child becomes a victim of the fierce appeal of peers. Often he does not even look for ways to protect himself, believing that he deserves something similar.

From time to time, the cause of anger may not be violence at all, but overprotection. This way of upbringing introduces a sense of permissiveness into the subconscious of the baby. The child considers himself the most basic and asks for unconditional submission. Unfortunately, a person who has not been taught by his parents to respect others will not gain this wisdom anywhere else. He won't even see how he humiliates you.

Inconsistency in society

An indirect prerequisite for ruthlessness is growing anxiety. Social inequality, inconstancy give rise to a feeling of discomfort. From the TV screens, people see again the same ruthlessness. A person whose psyche is formed is able to distinguish the grain from the husk, he will not perceive anger as a call to action. The child will absorb, like a sponge, on-screen scenes of violence. And he can perceive all this as some kind of school of life. It is fundamental to understand how similar television hurts the child's psyche, and the answer to the question: “Why have people become bitter?” will be received immediately.

Feeling rejected

It is especially developed during adolescence. But many adults carry these feelings into adulthood. Quite often, you can follow the picture when the baby loudly exclaims on the street and points his finger at a person with a different skin color or with a physical defect.

Adults react completely differently. On a subconscious level, they feel threatened. This is where the desire to self-destruct comes in. But for some it manifests itself in ruthlessness and violence. It is this feeling that sometimes forces teenagers to mock peers who are different from them. Why are people so ruthless? Again, the instilled abilities of tolerance and respect in the family will not allow a child or an adult to behave this way.

How to defend the victim

Psychologists say that in a team it is quite easy to find which people are merciless and who are the “lamb”. Therefore, the victim of anger is recommended to be identified by the following signs:

low self-esteem;
self-doubt;
full acceptance of the notion that problems are deserved.

You should start with understanding your own "I". Any person has a number of pluses and minuses. He is what he is. And no one has the right to offend him. Only by fully accepting this truth can one move further along the path of raising self-esteem, developing a sense of luck. Ancestors can help the child in this understanding. For an adult, since the behavior model has taken root, it is better to use the help of a professional psychologist.

Usually, a hobby for some new business helps a lot. You can even enroll in a martial arts class.

It is very important to think about the reaction to the offender. He will accept you completely differently if the answer is good from his expectations. In some cases, a sense of humor helps. Try not to succumb to irritation and bring a difficult conflict into the mainstream of a joke. With all this, learn to accept the least acutely objectionable situations.

How to deal with your anger?

The premises described above give an idea of why kind people become hardened. But how to deal with such manifestations? What to do if you start to boil internally?

Perfectly cleanse from the negative physical activity. After all, sport teaches conscious control over your feelings and body. Psychologists often advise to master breathing exercises. It will allow you to control both the body and the spirit.

Find a safe way out for the accumulated negativity. Release your emotions with a click. Just not for relatives and not for an employee. Shout where necessary. For example, become a specific football fan or attend rock concerts.

By the way, psychologists advise such a technique: to stand near the railway in the evening. When the train passes, yell at the top of your lungs, as loudly as you can. The noise of the wheels will drown out any sound. No one will hear you, but the body will receive the necessary relaxation.

Conclusion

Remember that only you can cope with the feeling of ruthlessness that appears inside you. And this is quite within your power. If you want to find the answer to the question “why are people so merciless”, start with yourself. Analyze your behavior. Get rid of the toxic feeling, because at some point it threatens to grow into a severe depression.

Human society has been constantly and intensively developing for many centuries. Some epochs are replaced by others, progress in all spheres of activity has erected man on the pedestal of the dominant species on planet Earth.

One thing is bad: everything changes on the path of progress, but no one, with all the aspirations, forces and opportunities, could neither prohibit, nor overcome, nor cancel cruelty. This character trait, like many others, manifests itself in different situations, changing a person to unpredictable consequences.

What is cruelty?

Cruelty is selfish selfishness, envy, hatred and malice towards other people, towards life and towards oneself. This is the result of a lack of success in achieving one's own goals and objectives with intentional or accidental harm to everything around.

It's no secret: what you sow, you reap - cruelty breeds cruelty. Causing harm to everything around in order to obtain benefits for themselves, people do not think about the consequences that will not take long to wait.

Forms of manifestation of cruelty

Cruelty has different forms manifestations: causing physical pain to a living being without any pity and compassion, hurtful words, all kinds of actions and even inaction, and often - unhealthy fantasies. She finds a loophole in straightforwardness and stubbornness, in mockery and deceit, in anger and unfriendliness, in intolerance for the mistakes of others.

The worst thing is when cruelty brings moral or physical pleasure. This is sadism. Moreover, people, animals, plants, buildings, monuments, transport, places of leisure, etc. suffer from harmful consequences.

Causes of cruelty

People are not born cruel. In society, there have always been norms of behavior, ethics and morality, on the border of which cruelty dozed. Violent people become violent for many reasons:

Overestimated or underestimated self-esteem. Dissatisfaction with life and yourself.
The concepts of morality and morality have lost their power.
Self-affirmation in a distorted form as a misunderstanding of the ways of self-preservation.
Children's fears that survived into adulthood in people who were faced with indifference, cruel punishments and a strict upbringing regime in childhood.
Demonstration of one's greatness and power in humiliating, mocking words, oppression and suppression, violence, murders. Sadism is the highest form of cruelty.
Pride and, as a result, a sense of revenge.
Concealment of personal complexes due to inferiority and weakness.
The manifestation of inhumanity in inaction, the enjoyment of it, the deliberate refusal to help.

Permissible cruelty

To better understand what cruelty is, you need to consider it as a reaction to intolerable circumstances that threaten the existence of a person. And the more violent they are, the more the response goes off scale.

The psychology of cruelty is a fine line on which good and evil balance. Is it possible to be a harmless, sympathetic, compliant person for everyone if you are faced with meanness, injustice, humiliation and insults? I think no. And the cruel ones are feared, shunned, sometimes even respected.

A tough person is a strong personality. Kindness cannot be opposed to cruelty if human life depends on it. Therefore, cruelty must be developed not for violence, but in order to resist it.

Why do cruel people exist? Man by nature is a predator. If you look back at the whole history, then the wars with the most severe destruction of all living things cannot be counted. Therefore, in any developed society, laws are necessary, the violation of which is fraught with severe punishment. Cruelty is an integral part of life, which means that you need to learn to live and fight with it, to look for new models of behavior.

Examples of cruelty in everyday life

Every person at least once asked what is also cruelty, examples of which are found all the time. All media are simply full of reports of atrocities and violence. Television, radio, the press, the Internet, fiction and non-fiction, history books - everywhere you can come across examples of cruelty.

Any historical social system, kings, serfdom, wars, repressions - everything is permeated with cruelty. The cult of cruelty in religions, sacrifice, aggression, intimidation, abuse of power, the off-scale level of crime and impunity, terrorism are also cruelty.

IN family life examples of cruelty can be the suppression of the will, energy vampirism, the creation of obstacles to the realization of intellectual, creative and professional opportunities, all kinds of prohibitions in planning offspring, budget, leisure, etc.

And, of course, cruelty to animals is an abyss from which it is impossible to get out. If a person is able to offend a dumb creature, then it is already difficult to call him a person.

What is cruelty in the children's world

Very often, cruelty manifests itself in children who are out of control. The cruelty of children is primarily associated with unfavorable relationships in the family. Lack of respect between family members, frequent quarrels in the presence of children reduce the level of trust in parents, which causes anger and aggression in the child.

Attention, care, patience, frankness will help protect children from cruelty. A personal role model is very important. The absence of cruelty on the part of parents to children and people around them will raise respect in the family to the proper level. Seeing and appreciating a child's personality, taking into account his opinions and interests, trying to see the world through his eyes is the key to success in the eternal problem of fathers and children.

How to overcome cruelty?

Knowing and understanding what cruelty is, you can take certain measures to protect yourself from it. Among them simple methods and work on yourself:

If you realize that cruelty is evil, then this is the first step towards solving the issue of getting rid of it.
You need to love yourself, people and everything the world, thereby get rid of internal fears.
You need to give to the world what you yourself want to receive: mercy, compassion, kindness.
Increasing self-esteem, striving for success, public recognition is one of the effective ways to combat cruelty.
Restriction of the circle of communication. Surrounded by kind and decent people, the world becomes cleaner.

Thus, cruelty is due to both external and internal factors that are laid in a person from childhood. We talked not only about our own ability to be cruel, but also about the very attitude towards such a manifestation of other people. Therefore, it is necessary to fight and prevent this property of character from childhood, instilling in the child kindness and mercy towards the people around him.

Throughout our lives, we have at least once met a person who, in our opinion, was cruel, angry and decidedly disgusting to us.

Yes, such answers are quite normal and common, however, this view of things is very narrow. These answers are naive, and it's time to better understand why "bad people are bad."

Why do we like to be offended?

What is your reaction?

Once we are fully prepared to let go of our anger and all its charms, we can truly understand why people are so bad. This realization will be of infinite benefit to you.

How to tear off the mask of mock cruelty?

We spew out excuses like “So what? We are all sufferers, but this is no excuse at all, ”and in this way we strengthen our confidence in our rightness and continue to torment ourselves.

However, if you are willing to take responsibility for yourself, your life, and your happiness, there is one thing you need to remember:

All cruel, evil, rude people are just like that, because they hurt.

No matter which approach you take, you are bound to learn something surprising: their behavior is driven by pain.

The next time someone treats you badly, take your time. Feel all the negative emotions and then let them go. Ask yourself, “What pain is this person experiencing that makes them do this?” Then open yourself to forgiveness and understanding, because all the mental patterns that led to such behavior on his part are or were in you. And the only reason why you can not have them is either a perfect childhood and adulthood or

The current world has become greedy. In other words, this concept can be defined as commercialism, avarice, greed for material wealth, greed. What does greed mean? This is an irrepressible craving for money or material goods, and often they are strangers. As a feeling, this phenomenon can be considered in many life examples.

In religion, greed is considered one of the deadly sins. A greedy person always carries anger towards others, does not trust anyone and avoids deep relationships. This leads to loneliness, when a person can be surrounded by people, but he will understand that he cannot be open to anyone.

Greed pushes people to do many things that they may later regret. Quite often various crimes (thefts, robberies, beatings, etc.) are committed on the basis of greed for material wealth. Modern people create families on the basis of love for money. They are friends with each other because they want access.

Of course, I wonder why people have become so evil and cruel, you might think they used to be different. There is a paradox: people always think that modernity is going to hell, but in the past, yes, it was good there, not like now. Rubbish, not time ... And people partially or completely correspond to time. But still, we will try to consider why people are so bad, and whether this is true.

It is important to understand that the categories of "good" and "evil" are usually relative. Of course, there are absolutely horrendous acts that a Muslim, a Christian and an atheist will equally condemn. But now it's not about that, but about the norm. If we take, for example, murder, then, on the one hand, it is evil, and on the other hand, when a terrorist or a maniac is eliminated, then it is not so evil, from the point of view of an ordinary person.

Or another example. Disputes about the legitimacy of euthanasia as a phenomenon do not stop now. Some shout that a person should die with dignity, and if he is tormented by pain.

Main reasons

The greed of people is the love of money, acquisitiveness, greed, in other words, it is an immoderate desire to receive Money or other material goods. In Catholic theology, human greed is considered one of the main flaws, the main vices, mortal sins, since it leads to an increase in troubles and worries, internal anger, unsociableness. In addition, the described vice tirelessly provokes fear of loss and anger.

The word greed is associated with greed (covetousness), which is condemned by all nations. Often this sin serves as a motive for committing a serious illegal act or is the cause of a tragedy.

Feeling of greed

Acquisitiveness or greed is a vice, which consists in the lack of control over a person's own desire to receive material wealth. At the same time, as these very benefits accumulate, the feeling of satisfaction does not appear, on the contrary, greed inflames more and more.

Mankind has come up with 7 deadly sins. Greed is one of them. What is this feeling? Many people confuse greed with greed. It's very close, but not all. Many argue that this is selfishness. Well, greed and this quality includes. The article will talk about what greed means, give examples and consider the problem of this phenomenon.

What is Greed?

What is Greed? You can notice that many people act out of the intention to get something. It is good when a person receives money or any other material benefits. All people need material goods, which is natural in the world of market and economic relations. However, for some people this desire is excessive. They are no longer interested in anything, like the material side of any issue, where they will receive some reward (preferably in monetary terms). This is called greed.

Why are people greedy? Greed gives birth to evil in people, therefore greed is called one of the most impartial manifestations in Christianity: anger, greed and crime are born by greed. Why is it necessary to fulfill the 10 commandments? Only the insatiable greed for knowledge and doing good deeds is justified, but about everything else, see the article below.

Why are people greedy

Under greed, it is most often customary to understand specific personal data:

desire to have and spend more money to myself; lack of desire to lose their wealth; desire for accumulation and acquisitiveness.

Sometimes, a completely non-greedy person can show actions that are associated with greed, for example, unwillingness to spend money on themselves or their loved ones - this can be caused by a material situation or a number of circumstances.

Greed has existed at all times - this is a natural quality of character, since material wealth has always determined the level of existence and life.

Concepts of happiness in this world

What is greed? Why are we silent, don't you know what greed is? … Yes, an insatiable desire for the fruits of material labor, greed. What is the reason for the occurrence? What is the reason? The main reason for greed, why? No. What is the main cause of greed? I told you in lectures. This reason is the nature of the soul, what nature, what type of nature, huh? Yes. The soul has such power, it wants to be happy, and this desire is limitless, it has no end. Therefore, a person who sees his happiness in the material, i.e. he believes that the more things he has at home, the more money he has, the happier he will be, then this is greed. Understandable, right?

Greed means our original state: we want to be happy. Therefore, can a person be accused of being greedy? In the same way, how can we accuse each other that we are generally doing the wrong thing here.

Why modern people are so heartless and cruel. Over the past few years, people have become callous and less tolerant.

The National Sociological Research Service came to this conclusion after analyzing the results of a large-scale survey on the relationship between people and the changing social climate in the UK. And this is not the only country where attitudes towards the poor have noticeably worsened.

Every second Briton today believes that the country's social policy is too soft, and the benefits are too large.

One in four is convinced that people have financial difficulties only because they are lazy and slow. Since 1983, when statisticians first conducted such a study, the number of those who believe that the state cares too much about the unemployed and the poor has almost doubled to 54%.

People have become cruel, too cruel. It is especially scary to watch today's news: someone was beaten with bats, someone was tortured, someone was shot, a bomb was dropped on someone ... We are already literally shaking from cruelty, can it really be worse? What is happening with our world? Why do people become angry and cruel? And how, in the end, to stop this bacchanalia of pain, horror and despair?

Why are some people kind and some cruel?
Why exactly modern people have become especially cruel?
Why do kind people become cruel? Under what circumstances does this happen?
How to stop cruelty in the world? How to change the world for the better?

When the world around you starts to seem wrong, and people are too cruel - this is a signal. Not to the fact that you need to pout, close in the apartment, be afraid of everyone around, be offended or angry. Not! This is a call to action. This is a signal that it is worth changing the world so that it becomes better, kinder.

The sage and the disciple sit at the gates of their city. A traveler comes up and asks:

What kind of people live in this city?
- And who lives where you came from? - asks the sage.
- Oh, bastards and thieves, vicious and depraved ...
- Here, the same, - answered the sage.

After a while, another traveler came up and also asked what kind of people were in this city.
- And who lives where you came from? - asked the sage.
- Fine people, kind and sympathetic, - the traveler has answered.
“Here you will find the same,” said the sage.

Why did you say to one that rascals live here, and to another that good people live here? - the student asked the sage.
“There are good people and bad people everywhere,” the sage answered him. - Just everyone finds only what he can.

Each of us at least once in life faced with the indifference of others. The negative opinion and attitude of another person can hurt, can annoy and even infuriate, but when it is completely absent, this cannot but be alarming. No one wants to face aggressive people, but it's hard to deny: they are alive, they experience emotions. They can be reassured, their problems are usually manageable. But how to react to a person whose look expresses nothing, who feels neither pain nor compassion? The answer is clear enough: be afraid of indifferent people.

It would seem that what is in them? Gray personalities, to which even the word "personality" is difficult to apply. Yes, sometimes they are crammed with knowledge, they can easily retell the plot of a book or film, have a hobby, in a word, be like all people ... But try to talk to them. You will lose interest in what they are saying after the very first phrases, because they will be deprived of a simple human relationship.

if a person does not live for himself, i.e. lives for himself, he will not refrain from greed. Such is the nature of the soul. Sooner or later, he will want to tear as much money as possible, it's only a matter of time. If a person lives for himself, and he thinks: I will live modestly, to whom I am doing bad, I good man, nothing bad for anyone, I just earn, I have a salary, everything, it's only a matter of time when he becomes greedy. Such is the nature of the soul, it is infinite in nature, it cannot stop there. Today is one thing, tomorrow is another. Therefore, there will be no happiness in this, the family lives in peace, it just calmly earns as much as it should, and that's it, no problems.

There comes a moment, and you all now remember your lives, someone, many people had it, the family lives quietly, does not touch anyone, lives for itself, earns honestly, the moment comes, and all this happiness collapses because of greed.

Main prerequisites

Psychologists identify three reasons why people are violent:

Dissatisfaction with life. Persons who are dissatisfied with their own fate are quite often subjected to stress and depression. These emotions overwhelm their soul so much that at any moment they are ready to break free. That is why all the negativity is often splashed out by mothers on children. Some people, under the influence of anger, break tree branches, beat animals. This spiritual state is quite unsafe, as it threatens the owner with the appearance of neuroses, psychological disorders. In addition to all this, the constant negativity seriously shortens life expectancy, leads to the development of heart disease or skin dilemmas.
Indifference. Very often, it specifically gives rise to unjustified ruthlessness. Some people do not even try to realize how much pain their actions can cause, and sometimes words. They don't think how much they can hurt another. With all this, the object of their ruthlessness becomes a weak creature that cannot show emotions and explain how much pain they caused him.
Suppressed emotions. From time to time, a person shows anger "on the side." Such behavior is characteristic of those who in daily life are obliged to constantly hide and suppress desires, emotions, impulses. In most cases, such ruthlessness is characteristic of grown children (especially boys) who grew up in a family of authoritarian parents. Employees who are obliged to unconditionally follow the orders of the boss, not being able to reveal their will, in certain conditions can show very cruel cruelty.

Historical ruthlessness

Affairs with relatives

root of evil

Inconsistency in society

Feeling rejected

How to defend the victim

Psychologists say that in a team it is quite easy to find which people are merciless and who are the “lamb”. Therefore, the victim of anger is recommended to be identified by the following signs:

low self-esteem;
self-doubt;
full acceptance of the notion that problems are deserved.

Usually, a hobby for some new business helps a lot. You can even enroll in a martial arts class.

How to deal with your anger?

The premises described above give an idea of why kind people become hardened. But how to deal with such manifestations? What to do if you start to boil internally?

Conclusion

The harsh truth is that inhuman cruelty is peculiar only to man. No animal can compare with man in terms of the power of manifestations of hatred towards his own kind. Why are people so mean?

Every day we see examples of horrific cruelty in the media. Beatings, murders, massacres, torture...

The guy killed the girl because she laughed at him in the company. 122 blows were found on the victim's body. The examination found that the first blow was fatal. A psychiatric examination showed the sanity of the perpetrator.

Where does this inhuman cruelty come from?

The harsh truth is that inhuman cruelty is peculiar only to man. No animal can compare with man in terms of the power of manifestations of hatred towards his own kind. Why are people so mean? Let's try to understand from a scientific point of view.

Man is an animal

Nobel Prize winner German animal psychologist Konrad Lorenz, impressed by the horrors of the Second World War, decided to find out the nature of human aggression. As a zoologist and evolutionary theorist, he decided to start by investigating the nature of aggression in animals. Lorentz found that all animals have mechanisms of hostile behavior towards members of their own species, that is, innate intraspecific aggression, which, as he argues, ultimately serves to preserve the species.

Intraspecific aggression performs a number of important biological functions:

distribution of living space so that the animal finds its own food; the animal guards its territory, aggression stops as soon as the boundaries are restored;

sexual selection: only the strongest male gets the right to leave his offspring; in mating battles, the weak one is usually not finished off, but driven away;

protection of offspring from the encroachment of strangers and their own; parents drive away but do not kill offenders;

hierarchical function - determines the system of power and subordination in the community, the weak obeys the strong;

partnership function - coordinated manifestations of aggression, for example, to expel a relative or a stranger;

feeding function is built into species that live in places poor in food resources (for example, the Balkhash perch eats its own juveniles).

It is believed that the main forms of intraspecific aggression are competitive and territorial aggression, as well as aggression caused by fear and irritation.

Are animals kinder than people?

However, after analyzing the behavior of more than 50 species, Konrad Lorenz noticed that animals that have natural weapons in their arsenal in the form of huge horns, deadly fangs, strong hooves, strong beaks, etc., have developed behavioral analogues of morality in the process of evolution. It is an instinctive prohibition against using one's natural weapons against an animal of one's own kind, especially when the vanquished is showing submissiveness.

That is, in aggressive behavior animal built automatic system stops, which instantly works on certain types of postures that indicate dependence and defeat. As soon as the wolf, in a fierce fight for the female, substitutes the jugular vein on the neck, the second wolf only slightly squeezes his mouth, but never bites through to the end. In the battle of deer, as soon as one deer feels weaker, it becomes sideways, exposing the enemy to an unprotected abdominal cavity. The second deer, even in a fighting impulse, only touches the opponent's stomach with its horns, stopping at the last second, but not completing the final deadly movement. The stronger the natural weapons of the animal, the more clearly the “stop system” works.

Conversely, poorly armed animal species do not have instinctive prohibitions against lethal aggression towards their relative, since the harm caused cannot be significant and the victim always has the opportunity to escape. In captivity, when the defeated enemy has nowhere to run, he is guaranteed death from a stronger opponent. In any case, as Konrad Lorenz emphasizes, in the animal world, intraspecific aggression serves exclusively the purpose of preserving the species.

Lorenz considers a man by nature to be a weakly armed species, therefore, having no instinctive prohibitions on harming his own kind. With the invention of weapons (stone, ax, gun), man became the most armed species, but evolutionarily devoid of "natural morality", therefore easily killing representatives of his own species.

There is one nuance here. We humans, unlike animals, are conscious. This difference hides the root of man's cruelty to man in comparison with the intraspecific aggression of an animal.

Man is an animal that is never enough

The system-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan says that consciousness was formed gradually as a result of the growth of our shortcomings. Animals do not have such a volume of desires as a person, they are completely balanced and perfect in their own way.

Man always wants more. More than he has, more than he can get, and if he got it, then more than he can eat. Lack is when “I want, but I can’t get”, “I want, but I can’t”. It was this lack that made it possible for the development of thought, which became the beginning of a separation from the animal state, the beginning of the development of consciousness.

Dislike as an engine of progress

The system-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan claims that a person, unlike animals, feels his own uniqueness, separation from another.

For a long time, experiencing hunger and not being able to fill it (our species was the weakest in the savannah - without claws, teeth, hooves), a person for the first time felt his neighbor as an object that can be used for himself, for food. However, having arisen, this desire was immediately limited. In the delta between the desire to use one's neighbor in oneself and the restriction on this desire, a feeling of hostility towards the other is born.

But that's not all, once bursting beyond the limits of the animal volume, our desires continue to grow. They double. Today they bought a Cossack - tomorrow they wanted a foreign car, today they bought a foreign car - tomorrow they wanted a Mercedes. On this simple example it is clear that a person is never satisfied with what he has received.

Our ever-growing desire to receive constantly leads to the growth of dislike. Lorentz proved that animals have an intraspecific unconscious coherent instinct that does not allow intraspecific aggression to destroy the species. For humans, intraspecific hostility still poses a threat to survival - as it is constantly growing. At the same time, it is also an incentive for us to develop. It was in order to limit hostility that we first created the law, then culture and morality.

Why are people so mean? Because they are people!

Man is a lack of pleasure, a desire. Our desires are not satisfied - we immediately feel hostility. Mom didn't buy ice cream: "Bad mom!" The woman does not meet my expectations: "Bad woman!". I feel bad, I don’t know what I want: “Everyone is bad. The world is cruel and unfair! It is not in vain that moral and cultural norms are instilled in a child from early childhood. Mutual assistance, sympathy, empathy for another help us cope with our selfish desires for pleasure.

Today, our desires continue to grow, and the existing constraints on them cease to work. Skin law and visual culture have almost worked themselves out. Today we are rapidly rushing into the future, where a person is no longer moral (because his desires are too high to be limited by morality and morality), but not yet spiritual. Today we are ready to eat anyone, to consume the whole world, if only we were well, real troglodytes - but this does not mean degradation. This is another step in our growth, the answer to which should be the emergence of new level limiters.

The path from animal to human

The system-vector psychology of Yuri Burlan says that in the conditions of increased desires and increased hostility, no restrictions on hostility will work anymore. Our coexistence in the future will be built not on prohibitions, but on the complete disappearance of hostility as such.

In contrast to the awareness of one's uniqueness and the other as an object for saturating one's shortcomings, systems thinking gives an awareness of the other person as oneself, as well as an awareness of the integrity of the human species. This is a new level of consciousness, much higher than the intraspecific animal unconscious instinct. This is the awareness of oneself as a part of all mankind and the awareness of another person as a part of oneself. And, as a result, the inability to harm another. Just as a person cannot harm himself on purpose, so he will not be able to harm another, because he will feel his pain as his own.

In fact, people are not evil and not worse than animals, people are just not yet mature enough. We have grown so much mentally that we invented the hadron collider, but we still have not matured to self-awareness. Daily outbursts of aggression, violation of all norms of morality and morality at the level of entire states are evidence that the time has come.

And stopping aggression is easier than it seems at first glance. You just need to see the underlying causes of what is happening and eliminate them. To understand that the picture of the world around us with cruelty, murders, crimes is the result of the fact that each of us considers himself the only one and feels only his desires. And for the sake of his "I want" he is even ready to kill, if necessary. But the paradox is that even this will not fill a person with happiness. Neither the one who shows aggression, nor the one against whom it is directed, can actually feel joy, and will be equally unhappy.

This can be corrected by realizing the true desires and capabilities of each of us. Understanding the inner potential of a person and his intentions, we will be able to clearly understand what can be expected from our environment and how to most adequately express ourselves among others. When we deeply understand another person and the motives for his actions from the inside, we do not become victims of unexpected aggression, because people's actions become easily predictable and predictable. Moreover, we can consciously choose our environment in which we feel comfortable and safe. It would be ideal if every person in the world could do this and everyone would be happy, but even if this is still far away, it is worth starting with yourself.

You can register for free online lectures on Systemic Vector Psychology by Yuri Burlan at the link:

The article was written based on the materials of the training " System-Vector Psychology»